Failure is an option for too many people these days

“People may fail many times, but they become failures only when they begin to blame someone else.” Unknown

There is nothing inherently wrong with failing. It is how we learn and grow. Very few people are actually successful in their first attempt at anything. We usually try something one way and if it doesn’t work, make a few changes, then try again. That doesn’t mean that we’re failures.

There are people who try to accomplish a certain goal, or task, over and over again. Even if they fail a hundred times, they continue trying. They are not failures. If they accept defeat and give up on that goal or task, they are still not failures. What is important is that they tried as best they could and realized it was something they themselves are unable to accomplish. That is where the honor is, to accept the fact that you cannot succeed 100 percent of the time, to acknowledge that something is beyond your abilities.

When you accept that premise, you learn from it. You learn to change your approach, to try a different tact. You don’t repeat the same steps with the next goal that you did with the previous one, if you know they didn’t work before.

What we see in politics is the exact opposite. No one accepts responsibility for a failure. Mayors, Governors, Congressmen, Senators and even Presidents do this all the time. They try to live up to promises they made. When they are unsuccessful, they find someone, or something, else to blame. When the next task or goal comes along, they try the same approach which failed earlier, again. When that task fails, they again pass the blame elsewhere.

This is why many politicians are failures. Not because they tried something and couldn’t get it done. They are failures because they couldn’t do something and placed the blame elsewhere.

Nothing is impossible. There are many politicians, and individuals, who’ve overcome tremendous odds and failures to achieve success. Abraham Lincoln, Franklin Roosevelt, John F Kennedy, Thomas Edison, Albert Einstein, Henry Ford, Roland Reagan, Winston Churchill, Oprah Winfrey, Vincent Van Gogh, Dr. Seus, Stephen King, JK Rowling, Monet, Michael Jordan, Babe Ruth and even Elvis Presley and the Beatles.

All of them succeeded when others before them couldn’t or when told they should go home. They didn’t go back home, saying ‘well, these people said no’. They kept trying. They tried a different approach if they needed to change. They used the same approach if they knew they were right. Thomas Edison tried 10,000 times to come up with the light bulb before he finally succeeded.

You will never be a failure when you take responsibility for your destiny into your own hands. Passing the blame onto others is an easy way out, and a sure sign of a failure.

Are you looking for beauty with your eyes or your mind?

” The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed.” Albert Einstein

It is the imagination, the mind, which determines what is beautiful or what is average or just plain. Each person has their own interpretation of what is beautiful. However, the one true aspect of beauty is that it comes from the mind. Something mysterious, which doesn’t reveal everything, stimulates the mind. The mystery behind the object, what our mind sees, is what makes us wonder. This is why is it not what you look at, but rather what you see that matters.

Gazing at something that we understand does little to stimulate the mind. Many people say the naked body is beautiful, but that is not true. A well proportioned body with just the right parts covered is beautiful. A naked body leaves nothing to the imagination. There is no mystery behind a naked body, no matter how well proportioned. More people would find a model beautiful, in a certain pose with clothes on, than in the same pose with no clothes on. Naked, we begin to see their flaws, how skinny they are, how their bones are protruding where they shouldn’t be. Clothed, we imagine how they would look underneath, how perfect their bodies must be.

It is the same with art, words or knowledge. The person who knows everything is boring. The person who knows everything speaks with precise words, conveying everything about each topic. This leaves nothing to the imagination, and so, people find those who can explain things in minute details boring. The interesting people are the ones who stimulate our mind, who give us just enough information to make us think, to let our imagination wonder.

Art and pictures that people find beautiful are the ones which make them wonder. “What was the artist thinking when he painted this?”. “How did the photographer get those colors in that landscape?”

This is the reason why most people find text books boring. They are nothing more than vessels conveying facts. They do nothing to our imagination, unless they are books about your chosen profession, in which case they will spark your imagination. The best books in the world are the ones which make people think, which ignite the imagination.

This is why most people can’t watch a movie or read a book if they already know the ending. The ability for it to stimulate your mind has been taken away.

If you want to enjoy this life, to get more satisfaction out of the time you’ll spend here, leave something for your imagination. Don’t know 100 percent of everything. Try just knowing 90 percent. Let your imagination come up with the other 10 percent. You’ll start finding beauty where you never did before.

Are there limits to human stupidity?

““Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.” Albert Einstein

It is said that although the universe is always expanding, it may not be infinite, we just haven’t found the end.

Human stupidity, on the other hand, seems to be quite infinite. Each time we think we’ve seen the limits of human stupidity, someone does something stupider than anything else before.

Historian have shown us that history repeats itself, but have we learned from previous mistakes? Our stupidity refuses to let us. We think things will be different this time because we’re wiser, only to get proven wrong on both counts.

Not too long before the US economic collapse, Japan underwent a similar economic collapse. The collapse in Japan lasted over ten years. Economists here put much of the blame on the Japanese government for keeping interest rates at or near 0. They called it the lost decade. In the US, the government is going the same things that Japan did. This is history repeating itself within a matter of years, not decades or centuries, and yet we still think things will be different, because we’re smarter.

To get a better idea of the infinite levels of human stupidity, just turn on the television. There’s dozens of reality shows, each trying to outdo the other by seeing who can find the stupidest people. Each time we think people couldn’t get much stupider, a new reality show comes on, proving that yes indeed, we can get much stupider.  Remember when we thought people couldn’t get any stupider than the ones on the original talk shows, like the Jerry Springer show? When you hear things like “I don’t know which of these ten men is my babies biological father” doesn’t it make you cringe?

Every generation that comes along thinks it’s smarter than the one before it. We learn too late how stupid we were, that we should have listened to our parents. Our children think they’re different, that they’re smarter than we were. They’ll make the same mistakes we made.

Human stupidity seems to have no bounds. From individuals to countries, we continually amaze ourselves. To see how stupid nations are, just turn on the news. You’ll see another country, the size of a flea, trying to take on the world.

Wouldn’t it be amazing if our levels of compassion were infinite, rather than our stupidity?

 

The parent, not genes, is responsible for how a teenager is

“I have also seen children successfully surmounting the effects of an evil inheritance. That is due to purity being an inherent attribute of the soul.” Mahatma Gandhi

No one is born evil, or good for that matter, just because their parents or ancestors were that way.

A baby is born pure, balanced, with no pre-disposition to do what others in his or her blood line have done before. It’s not what has happened in the past which determines how a child will grow, but what happens at present that matters most.

The first two years of a babies life are the most crucial. That is when the brain is beginning to develop. Shower the baby with love and attention, and the parts of the brain relating to love and emotions will begin to develop more.

Babies which are given plenty of love and attention within the first two years of life, are more likely to grow to become loving and caring individuals.

Babies that are not held, not shown love, and not given any attention during the first two years, never fully develop that part of the brain. They are more likely to grow up to become unfeeling, emotionless adults.

It’s the babies environment and upbringing which determines the type of character the baby will have as an adult. To try teaching love and morals when the child is a teenager, or grown adult is much too late. A parent has to begin showing a baby the traits they want the child to inherit while the brain is forming, within the first two years of life. The parent then has to keep re-enforcing these traits as the child grows. This duty of a parent never goes away. It doesn’t go away when the child is fully grown and moves out. A parent  becomes free of this duty only upon death. If at all possible, it may not even end there.

Parents cannot be held blameless for the actions of their children, if they didn’t shower them with love and affection during the most crucial years of life. A parent can’t say they don’t know why their grown son or daughter are evil, if they never showed them any love when they were born, and as they grew.

To ignore a baby, to only give it the basic necessities for survival, ought to be a crime. Parenting is more than just bringing a baby into the world. The character of the baby is directly influenced by what the parents do or don’t do. An adult who is prone to evil wasn’t born that way. An adult prone to evil was ignored as a baby, never shown any love or affection.

What parents do or don’t do directly impacts which parts of the babies brain develop more.  This is one of the reasons middle children are different than first or last born siblings. Depending on the household, either first born or last born children would get the greatest amount of love and affection during the crucial years. Those children usually grow up being the most balanced and with the best traits.

To raise a person of morals and good character, begin when the baby is born. Impart the traits you want the baby to inherit by doing them repeatedly and consistently. If you want the teenager to hug you, hug the baby. If you want the teenager to love you, love the baby. If you want the teenager to talk to you, talk to the baby. The teenager will be a reflection of you, the way you acted when the teenager was a baby.

Are you really in love?

“Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you was beyond my control.” Author Unknown

How many of you really know what true love really is? For those of you that are in love, think back to when you first met. Was it fate, which stepped in to get the two of you to meet? If you said no, then you probably aren’t in love. If you’re in love, you would look at the first time you met as something ordained, something that was meant to happen.

When did you fall in love? Where you friends first, and then gradually over time fell into love?  If you fell in love at first sight, then it’s not true love, it’s infatuation. You might think it’s love, but trust me, it’s not true love. True love develops as you get to know the other person. When you first meet, you may like the other person enough to become friends. Sometimes, you may not even like the other person.

After you became friends, did the amount of time the two of you spent together get longer each week? Did your heart start beating fast in anticipation of spending time together? Did you lay awake in bed, unable to fall asleep, because you couldn’t stop thinking of the other person. Did you find yourself smiling as you walked down the street, or got on the bus, because you thought of the other person? If none of that happened to you, then you’re not truly in love.

When the two of you were together, did you lose track of time? If you kept looking at the time, or thought about food, or thought about work, then you’re not in love.

Did you get up one day, and decide that you love the other person? If you did, then it’s not true love.

True love happens when the two of you know so much about each other that you become almost one. When you look into the others eyes, you can see into their soul, the same way that they can see into your soul. True love is not something you fall into or out of. True love is something that happens, and never goes away.

When you’re truly in love, you’ll do anything to please your love. Everything else becomes secondary.

How many of you would change jobs to be nearer to your love, or to make your love happy? Those of you who wouldn’t change jobs are not truly in love. You may think you’re in love, but over time it will fade and the two of you will drift apart. True love never fades. You and your love will never drift apart. You will be the couple we occasionally see, walking hand in hand into a restaurant, celebrating their 60th anniversary. If you watch that couple closely, you’ll see they still have that glazed look every time they look into each others eyes. It’s the same look they had when they first fell in love.

To see if you’ll be celebrating your 60th anniversary, look into your loves eyes. Do the two of you get that glazed look? Then congratulations, you’re in love!

LOVE

LOVE is not made of kisses, or of sighs,
Of clinging hands, or of the sorceries
And subtle witchcrafts of alluring eyes.

Love is not made of broken whispers; no!
Nor of the blushing cheek, whose answering glow
Tells that the ear has heard the accents low.

Love is not made of tears, nor yet of smiles,
Of quivering lips, or of enticing wiles:
Love is not tempted; he himself beguiles.

This is Love’s language, but this is not Love.

If we know aught of Love, how shall we dare
To say that this is Love, when well aware
That these are common things, and Love is rare?

As separate streams may, blending, ever roll
In course united, so, of soul to soul,
Love is the union into one sweet whole.

As molten metals mingle; as a chord
Swells sweet in harmony; when Love is Lord,
Two hearts are one, as letters form a word.

One heart, one mind, one soul, and one desire,
A kindred fancy, and a sister fire
Of thought and passion; these can Love inspire.

This makes a heaven of earth; for this is Love.

Goals and ambition are not for everyone

“Give me a stock clerk with a goal, and I will give you a man who will make history. Give me a man without a goal, and I will give you a stock clerk.” J.C. Penny

In order for the world to function, all types of people are needed. Stock clerks are needed just as much as doctors, lawyers, entrepreneurs and craftsmen.

A world full of overly ambitious people would be a very sad world indeed. Many people are content with their lot in life. They are content to let others do the leading, the strategizing and the planning, while they do what is required of them.

While there are many who want to make history, many of the store clerks of the world are content simply being part of history. They are content working, and then devoting their energy and resources on their family and friends. Sometimes the overly ambitious lose sight of the other important things in life. More often than not, they don’t lost sight, but decide that ambition is more important to them than friends and family.

Having an ambitious dream, wanting to make history, is no easy matter. It requires sacrifice, dedication and lots of hard work. In order to be able to set goals, you have to know where you want to be, where your want to go. You need to have a dream. Setting a goal helps you reach that dream. People who set goals succeed because they know what they want, and the goals give them achievable targets to strive for.

Goals are like mile markers. They tell you if you’re making progress, if you’re going in the right direction, towards your final destination. Setting goals that are impossible to reach would only frustrate you, eventually leading towards frustration and depression. The secret to setting goals is to look at them as landings on a flight of stairs. If you want to walk to the top of the tallest building, set your first goal to reaching the first, second or third landing. Once there, you set your next goal to reach another landing within reach. Going one landing at a time allows you to track your progress, to see if you need to adjust your strategy, and to set your next goal. By continually setting difficult, yet   achievable, goals, you’re able to realize a seemingly impossible dream. If you try to climb to the top of the building in one try, you’ll wear yourself out and risk the chance of never reaching the top.

If you decide to get married and have kids, one of your goals will be to ensure your kids have everything they need to succeed. To do that, you need to start setting goals as early as possible. If you don’t set any goals, you’re letting the environment determine what happens to your children. Is that a risk you’re willing to take? To get into a good college, a parent has to plan long before your kids get into high school. It’s okay for your children to be stock clerks if that is what they choose to be. It’s not okay for them be stock clerks because you never set any goals while raising them, giving them no choice but to be stock clerks.

What you think makes you who you are.

“All that we are is the result of what we have thought. If people speak or act with evil thoughts, pain follows them. If people speak or act with pure thoughts, happiness follows them, like a shadow that never leaves them.” Siddhartha Gautama

Many times you’ve probably heard that after a while, people and their pets begin to resemble each other. It is the same with people and their thoughts. You become the person that’s contained within your thoughts.

If you’re preoccupied with evil thoughts, you will become an evil person. If you’re preoccupied with good thoughts, you’ll become a good person.

What you think becomes who you are.  When you think evil thoughts, not only do you become an evil person, but pain and torment will find you no matter where you go.

When you think, speak and act with pure thoughts, you’ll become a good and decent person. Goodness and happiness will greet you where ever you go.

It is the same with failure and success. If you think, deep down, that you will fail at any task you try, then you really will fail. If, deep down, you know that you will succeed, then chances are that you will find success. One of the differences between the two, is that the person who knows they will fail will give up after each failure. The person who knows they will succeed doesn’t let a failure here or there stop them. The person who knows they will succeed will continue trying, regardless of how many failures they encounter, until they finally succeed.

If you want to change yourself, begin by changing how you think. Begin by changing your thoughts, by thinking like the person you want to be. If you want to be a winner, think like a winner. If you want to be a good person, remove evil thoughts from your mind, and try to think of happiness.

Not only are you what you eat, you are also what you think. There are no born losers. No one is born unlucky. If you think you’re a loser, you will be a loser. If you think you’re unlucky, you will be unlucky.

Change begins from within. Through the power of your thoughts, everything is possible.

When did we become a nation of haters?

“If you will think about what you ought to do for other people, your character will take care of itself. Character is a by-product, and any man who devotes himself to its cultivation in his own case will become a selfish prig.” Woodrow Wilson

When did we become a nation of haters? The United States began as the nation of brotherly love. The United States of America represented equality for all. At one time, the United States of America stood for common decency towards all. The people and the government of the United States of America used to be the envy of the world. Something built to government specifications and standards meant unequaled quality and value.

What happened to the people? What happened to our government and elected leaders? What happened to government standards?

We’ve become a nation of haters. We hate the poor because they can’t fend for themselves. We hate the rich because they are successful. We hate the government because it’s become a den of corruption and infighting.

Government specifications and standards are meaningless now. Build whatever you want, someone in the government will buy it, regardless of how flimsy or overpriced it is, just as long as you make a contribution to their campaign.

We’ve become a nation obsessed with our own self preservation. We no longer care about anyone else, as long as we get our share. The rich want to get richer. The poor want more handouts. Those in between are either ignored or must sacrifice some more, so that the rich could get richer and the poor could get more handouts..

We devote ourselves to cultivating our own case. We fault the poor for being poor. We fault the ill for being ill. We fault the handicapped for being handicapped. We fault the rich for being successful. We fault the government for not doing enough. We fault the government for doing too much.

We look for others to fault, rather than looking to ourselves. We elect the leaders who don’t do enough. We elect the leaders who do too much. We’ve allowed ourselves to become disillusioned to the point where we don’t bother with elections anymore. Then we complain that we don’t have good leaders.

We’ve become selfish prigs. We’ve lost our character, our charm, our reputation. As long as we continue looking out for what’s in our best interest, rather than what’s in everyones best interest, or the nations best interest, we will never regain our character. We will never regain our reputation as the worlds greatest country, where all are treated equally and fairly. We will never again become the envy of the world.

Corporations forgot that it is both the customers and the workers who make them successful. Politicians forgot that they are elected to serve the people. Government agencies have become heartless robots that follow the letter of the law, no matter now cruel or inhumane.

No one has to go so far as to preach brotherly love. All we have to do is stop hating. All we have to do is show a little compassion for those less fortunate than we are. All we have to do is care about the health of this great nation. All we have to do is show a little bit of character.

Is that too much to ask? Is it too much to ask for people to say ‘I like this’, rather than ‘I hate that’. Is it too much to ask for our government and leaders to do something because it is the right thing to do, rather than doing what the campaign contributors want?